Honey, I Shrunk Yugi! Somehow
by TypoNumber5
Summary: Co-written with a TheVoices1. Yugi goes to a doctor in hopes of getting taller, but instead he gets... well, shorter. REALLY short. --Currently being rewritten!--


Honey, I Shrunk Yugi!

Chapter 1 written by TheVoices1, rewritten by TypoNumber5

Hidy-ho, all! Typo here. I'm currently in the process of rewriting all my script-format fics... yeah. I'll probably post the originals on and/or my own fanfiction site (started last night in a fight of rage-induced lunacy), fanfiction.biz.ly.

I have not talked to TheVoices about rewriting. Nya.

Disclaimer: We do not own Yuugiou. We will not repeat ourselves throughout this fic. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Yugi sat in his doctor's office, reading Domino Today. To his amazement, the crime rate had tripled during Battle City.

Gee, I wonder why?

"Mutou, Yugi!" the doctor yelled from behind the Menacing Doctor's Door of DOOM. For the sake of the fic, let's give Mr. Doctor a name... um... Bob!

Yugi jumped to his feet. "'Bout time!" He walked up to Dr. Bob with an impatient look on his face. "I'm ready!" he announced

"Hm?" The doctor looked around in confusion. "Who said that?"

Yugi frowned up at him. "Me." Was he blind?

"Where? I hear a voice but I don't know were it came from."

Yugi smacked his forehead. THAT again... "DOWN HERE!!!" he yelled.

The doctor looked down.

"Oh." he blinked. "Okay, c'mon."

Mysterious Clipboard in hand, he led Yugi into the backroom. It was decorated like any medical room (freakishly clean, scary looking examination equipment, and bizarre pictures of eyes on the walls) with one big exception. There was a gargantuan something covered in black fabric stationed conspicuously in the corner.

"If you could get on the table, please." The doctor motion towards a padded table covered with paper. For the blood, Typo's mom says.

Yugi did not know this, so he was spared the months of being afraid of doctor's tables. "'Kay."

He walked up to the table and tried to get on, but failed and fell on his face when he tried to pull himself up. "Erg!" he grunted and tried again. And failed again. And again. And again. The doctor, without any sign of emotion, pushed a stool toward him. The vertically challenged duelist hopped unto it, and managed to finally pull himself onto the table.

"Alright, Mr. Mutou." Bob peered down at him from over his thick glasses. "You say you want to be taller?"

Yugi nodded vigorously. "Hell yeah!"

The older man sighed. "Okay. We have a ray gun that will make you taller, but be warned-"

The ten-year-old looking teen waved the caution aside. "Yeah, yeah, yeah. 'Dangerous and risky.' Blah, blah, blah..." He rolled hid eyes. "Just make me taller!"

Bob shook his head. "Alright....."

He retreated to the corner and dramatically whipped the cloth off the Huge Something. It was revealed to be a large and ominous looking ray gun.

Oooooh... Shiney....

"Sweet!" Yugi whooped.

The doctor heaved another "Kids these days" sigh. "Alright. Hold still...."

Yugi prepared himself (quite happily) to be taller (6 feet, to be exact) while the doctor took careful aim.

To add sound effects to the Ray-Gun-Thingamabobber: "BLAAAAAAAAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Yugi was hit forcefully with the glowing green ray and began to change. However, not the way he had planned.

"What the hell?"

The poor boy, instead of growing a foot, had shrunk roughly four and a half feet. He was now 5 inches tall.

"...Whoopsies...." was all Bob said.

"What happened?!" Yugi screamed up from his small, square inch of the table.

In a very technical voice, the doctor answered, "Looks like the ray gun was on shrink instead of grow.... And, it overheated so I can't grow you back! Now, OUT OF MY OFFICE!!!!"

"Damn it!" was Yugi could say.

Skipping ahead...

Yugi walked along the sidewalk, dodging the occasional pedestrian as he did so.

"Where am I gonna find another ray gun to make me taller?" he muttered. "My life sucks a butt!" To add to his misfortune, he walked into a wad of gum and became inevitably stuck. "THIS REALLY SUCKS!"

A few minutes later, he spotted a woman in pink high-heels walking down the street. Out of desperation, he yelled up at her. "Hey, lady! Little help?"

She stopped, bewildered, and glanced around. "What? Who said that?"

Yugi waved his arms at her. "Down here!"

The woman was obviously a little weirded out by the disembodied voice. "AAAAHHHHH! The doctor said the voices would go away! AAAAHHHHHHH!" She then ran off screaming and jumped off a nearby bridge.

"...." The look on Yugi's face could only be described with an emoticon: 0.o

A week passed in which Yugi remained stuck and yelling at passer byers. Many more people jumped of bridges.

Finally, Jounouchi, Anzu, and Honda walked down the street.

"...And then Yugi threw a stick at me." Everyone's favorite blonde koinu was telling them.

Yugi performed a small jig to the best of his small, stuck-in-gum abilities. "Guys! Down here!"

Honda stopped walking and looked around. "Do you hear something?" he asked.

Anzu made the best comparison she could: "It sounds like a tortured flea."

"DDDDDAAAAAAAHHHHHH! DOWN HERE!" Yugi was becoming... um, how shall I put this? I-can't-believe-I'm-friends-with-these-morons frustrated.

Jounouchi looked down. "Oh, hey Yugi! You look different somehow.... New shoes?"

Yugi slapped his forehead. "No! I shrunk!"

Honda bent over to get a better look. "If it makes you feel better, I can't tell," he assured his friend.

Yugi resisted rolling his eyes. "Just get me outta here, will ya?"

Jounouchi grinned. "'Kay." He picked Yugi up and then - "Hey! It's like a mini-action figure! La la la la...." - began dancing.

From Yugi's point of view, it was like being on a Tilt-a-Whirl. And he didn't like thrill rides. "AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!! THIS SUCKS!! MAKE IT STOP!!! MAKE IT STOOOOOOP!!!!!!"

Anzu and Honda were unaware of this because they were playing Thumps.

"I give up!" Honda whined, rubbing his injured fingers. "Owie..."

Jounouchi's speed increased. In a blur of blue, white, and blonde, he spun so fast that Yugi was hurled into a sewer drain.

"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Three guess who THAT was.

Yugi landed in the sewer and fashioned a crude boat out of the remains of a cafeteria hot dog.

...Nasty.....

As he floated down the sewer, he sobbed, "What else can go wrong?"

As soon as the words left his mouth, a large rat jumped out and ate the boat. It then suffocated because cafeteria hot dogs are 90% rubber.

"........" -blink, blink - "............."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

If you've read the original, you'll notice we switched from using the dub names to the Japanese ones. We both agree the English names suck.

Please review!

--This chapter read on a third grade reading level with a reading ease of 79.2. 


End file.
